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| A Classic Diva Debacle |
| 05.05.05 (10:40 am) [edit] |
|
I was in Lowe's to get some cinderblocks. (Don't ask) I'm putting them in my shopping cart and realize that they were all muddy. Hence, my wonderfully-manicured hands were muddy too. I recalled that being so well-prepared, I had some of those little packets of 'wet naps' in my purse. But alas, how am I going to get one without my grubby paws dirtying my handbag? A fair prince in a red Lowe's vest named Marcus walks by. I play the damsel in distress and ask Marcus if he could help me. I show him my dirtied hands and ask if he would be so kind as to reach into the side pocket of my purse and get out one of my "handi-wipes". He nodded and dove into the side pocket. And pulled out a condom instead. I realized it the second I saw it. It took fair Marcus a second to realize it. The poor guy was black but he was as red as can be. I said "Marcus, I'm always prepared for anything, perhaps you can try again!" Poor Marcus reached in again and produced the Handi-Wipe. I open it and start cleaning my hands. Meanwhile, poor Marcus is still standing there, dumbfounded with a condom in his hand. (Dare I mention a mangery-type Lowes dude took a second look when he walked by?) I reclaimed my condom, took a deep chuckle and thanked Marcus for his assistance. BTW, the condom, I think, was past its expiration date. But I was too mortified to check. |
posted by: jennjr (reply)
post date: 05.05.05 (8:16 am)
LMAO!
That's all I can say. What a great story!
posted by: trekguy (reply)
post date: 05.05.05 (9:12 am)
ROTF LMAO!!!
OMG, this is just too wonderful!!
You must have been a Girl Scout!!
I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall to see this one!!
Ha Ha Ha HA Thaks for brightening my day!! And I wasn't even sad!!!
posted by: almsthvn (reply)
post date: 05.05.05 (10:43 am)
ROFL !! That's hilarious.
You could have said "you can keep it, consider it a tip" ;)
posted by: FinalyFree (reply)
post date: 05.05.05 (11:07 am)
OMG that is classic! Truly a diva moment, lol.
posted by: NurseNancy (reply)
post date: 05.05.05 (2:33 pm)
it's like being a mom and going through the pant pockets of teenage sons' before laundry, and finding the same thing....oops!!
posted by: SweetDiva (reply)
post date: 05.05.05 (2:47 pm)
ROTFLMBAO!!! That is TOOOOOOOOO Funny!
Well once upon a time I told my coworker that I don't blush.
I was like black people don't blush. There was this dude that was an manager at one of the Wendys I would go to for lunch, that I was "lusting" over. So my girl from work and I go there and din in for lunch one day. She ask one of HIS coworkers does he have a girlfriend and proceeds to tell her my friend here has a crush on him. the cowork of dude was and older lady...she proceeds to YELL out "D" there's a woman out here that WANTS you. {oh she said more...but I'll leave it at that}
I was proved wrong that day....I think I turn purple instead of red....but err....I got his #!! LoL!
posted by: almsthvn (reply)
post date: 05.06.05 (5:11 am)
Now that the laughter has subsided, I simply MUST ask. Cinderblocks?
Ya know, we haven't heard from XAir in awhile... you haven't been fishing off piers recently have you?
posted by: linda (reply)
post date: 05.06.05 (5:27 am)
That was great, thanks for making my day, I laughed so hard...never a dull moment..
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 05.06.05 (5:30 am)
Reply to: almsthvn
Cinderblocks - those cement bricky-things that have holes in the middle?
I have them on the back side of my raised-bed garden. In the holes, I have strawberry plants.
And XAir is in Kansas with little access to the internet. I think his connection is powered by a mule or something. I'm going to make him get-well cookies this weekend.
posted by: jerneedog (reply)
post date: 05.06.05 (11:04 am)
That was a great story! ;)
by Redonthehead