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| I don't know what to title this one... |
| 07.31.04 (6:58 pm) [edit] |
|
Owning a house is cool and all, but there are times where I really HATE yardwork. Especially mowing my 'yard' of newly-sprouted weeds and dead grass (Thanks again Spectracide!). I've procrastinated mowing and edging for a week or so. I was going to do it on Thursday, but JUST as I was heading out to mow, a HUGE t'storm came thru... I bribed myself yesterday. I said if I mowed/edged my yard that I could have some frozen blueberry yogurt. (I'll do just about anything for it - now Saint, don't get any ideas! LOL) I ended up having a long lunch with a friend and we were shuffled out of the restaurant at 3:30 so they could set up for dinner. We decided to see a movie (Manchurian Candidate - thought it sucked). I got home A LOT later than I had planned... But that blueberry yogurt was beckoning me.... So I got out the edger and the mower and started on the back yard. I edged and mowed - things went smoothly. Now to the front yard! I start edging the curb and around the beds. (My method of edging is more like 'scorched earth' than actual edging.) About 1/3 thru, the little plastic doo-hicky thing that actually chops the grass got cut off. Unplugged the weedeater and pulled some more length out - realized it was almost gone. Got started again when the little plastic doo-hicky thing went flying off. I muttered a few choice expletives. I have another roll of those plastic doo-hicky things but didn't know where it was and it was getting dark and that blueberry yogurt was calling even louder to me since I was grimy, covered in grass and HOT. So I said screw edging and started mowing again... My blueberry bush decided to inflict some revenge on me. The last time I edged, I kinda beheaded my blueberry sapling. I apologized profusely to it... Well, while mowing, I stepped in the hole where the remains of the blueberry plant is. Twisted my ankle (the one I had surgery on a few months ago and have spent a total of 3 years in a cast for). Not bad but I hope the blueberry plant feels revenge was inflicted.... It's beyond dusk. I'm pretty much mowing in the dark. But I was relieved it was a little cooler. I just kept thinking about my blueberry frozen yogurt... Got the equipment put away. (Shoulda been hosed off outside) Carefully went upstairs to shower away the ick. Got myself into my jammies, decided I needed a maniure/pedicure. Painted my toes/fingers a pretty mauvey peachy pink. Then I realized. Shit. I can't open the yogurt container with wet nails... So, the blueberry frozen yogurt is still in my freezer... BUT, my toes took great! I am NOT cut out for this yard work stuff. Manual labor that involves getting dirty and grimy is not for me. Let me sit in the hammock, sip lemonade and watch some hot strapping stud do it for me. Shirtless. Preferably in tight shorts.... And throw in another one to fan me and feed me peeled frozen grapes. Oh my... That sounds good, doesn't it? |
posted by: SheSpecies (reply)
post date: 07.31.04 (6:59 pm)
Mmm blueberry frozen yogurt sounds yummy!
posted by: newbie (reply)
post date: 07.31.04 (7:09 pm)
the labouring hot guys sound great... where do i sign up!?
posted by: tngirl6599 (reply)
post date: 07.31.04 (7:16 pm)
that's one reason i love having a hubby!
posted by: Daisymae (reply)
post date: 07.31.04 (10:40 pm)
Oh hell yeah...sign me up for one of those too!! ; )
posted by: Atomsk (reply)
post date: 07.31.04 (10:48 pm)
you should hit up your new boy toy to do that yard work for ya and all LOL hell thats what us men are for the manuel labor and all
posted by: lynne (reply)
post date: 08.01.04 (7:13 am)
mmmm. I like the hammock, studly lawn service, peeled grapes idea. :)
posted by: Cyberpal (reply)
post date: 08.01.04 (10:48 am)
Would have loved to help out with the manual labour hun, but then again... distance is a biatch!! hehe! :-P
The frozen yogurt sounds delish though :)
posted by: Mimi (reply)
post date: 08.01.04 (5:28 pm)
oh, diva...i know exactly how you were feelilng...me and my house, we need a rent a husband! xoxox this weekend, i called my son...cuz i had to go be with sissy! amazingly, it worked! lol!!! xoxox
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 08.01.04 (8:39 pm)
Reply to: Mimi
I don't think I'm going to spawn just to have an inhouse lawnservice!
posted by: Saint027 (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (4:21 am)
I smell a new line of work for me when I get out of the Marines!! Rent-a-stud. I'll do yardwork, fanning and the frozen grapes. I will work for blueberries, beer and any other "gratuities" that are being offered. LOL
PS. Got a tan this weekend so I'm not quite so glow-in-the-darkish white anymore! Hee hee
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (8:13 am)
Reply to: Saint027
So does that mean there are no tanlines?
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (8:14 am)
Reply to: Saint027
Let me know when you're discharged. I'll get the grapes ready...
posted by: Saint027 (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (9:03 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
You'd have to look and find out!! LMAO!!
OK, I can't even lie. I would never risk a sunburn on my most sensative of areas!! LOL
posted by: Saint027 (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (9:04 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
Sheeeeit!! I got 80 days of leave on the books. I wouldn't mind making some cash on the side ...
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (9:12 am)
Reply to: Saint027
Who said anything about cash? I was going to feed you with blueberries and sexual favors.
LMAO
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (9:14 am)
Reply to: Saint027
I've done my share of sunning in the buff. Granted, I imagine a crispy bit & pieces would be incredibly painful. But "Karla" could rub aloe on it. A lot. And often.
The worst in my book was having a crispy back and trying to wear a bra. But that was in the big-boob days. now I just go commando if necessary. (Wait, what would be the relevant term for going commando/braless?)
posted by: Saint027 (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (9:36 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
Thats fine!! I'll work on the barter system. :-)
posted by: Saint027 (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (9:38 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
No amount of rubbing is worth torching your ding-dong for. I'm pretty sure she'll rub it even if its not burned! LOL!
I have no idea what the proper term for braless is. I think commando is appropriate. I say go with that unless something better pops up.
posted by: Saint027 (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (9:39 am)
I just realized you said you sun in the buff!! HOLY F&%ING SH!T!!!!!!
*grabs my camera phone*
posted by: Mimi (reply)
post date: 08.02.04 (9:44 am)
probably not a good plan...i didn't "spawn" either! I married DAD! LOL! xoxox
by Redonthehead