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| Ouch |
| 07.15.07 (9:48 am) [edit] |
| Last night was sort of a stake through the heart. (Ok, I exaggerate a wee bit.) I was having a combo business meeting/social dinner with a guy. I would totally be into him but he's got a girlfriend. I mentioned that I was totally in need of cuddling. I don't really have any cuddle-buddies around - they'd all want 'more'. I'm not interested in revisiting that with them. "Hot Stud" would be a viable option, but he had been out of town. As we are leaving the place we were having our business meeting to go to dinner, "Hot Stud" called. I hadn't talked to him in a couple of days b/c his dad has been sick. My dinner person was standing there - and told me to ask "Hot Stud" to join us. "Hot Stud's" reply to me was "I've already got plans tonight." Translation: a date. Dinner person said to ask him to get together after his date. Uh. No. I don't want sloppy seconds and I know Hot Stud well enough to know he'll be busy all night long. (ahem) Considering the return of the aforementioned depression on my heels, this was not an embarrassing response to get in front of someone else. I think hormones are influencing me like crazy right now. (I totally admit I'm PMS-ing) Dinner guy tells me it's clear that I still have feelings for Hot Stud. Yes and no. I think a lot of people misconstrue my gratitude and affection toward him - I absolutely love the guy - but I also made the decision that although I think in many ways he is the ideal man, there are some areas that are blaringly not ideal for me. I'm smart enough to know he's not going to change. Dinner guy told me I needed to get laid. I know I could call any one of 10 guys and get laid within the hour if I wanted that - but I don't. I want more than just a romp. And I haven't met anyone worthy of distraction. And that's depressing too. |
posted by: auntconi (reply)
post date: 07.16.07 (2:22 pm)
Ouch, Ouch!
posted by: kurtmaddox (reply)
post date: 07.16.07 (3:55 pm)
Desire is the root of all suffering ;-)
by Redonthehead