Got a cut-off notice that my water was being shut off for non-payment. Amount of bill? $15.59 for the last 3 months. Odd because I was sure I had paid the bill.

So I go online and check my online bill-pay thru my bank. Yep. Was paid last month. So I called the county water office. Apparently if you have an IQ above 70, you're overqualified for this position. The woman insisted that I hadn't paid it. I'm explaining to her that it was paid electronically and giving her all the info.

Not good enough. I told her I could email her the confirmation. Nope.
I asked if I could fax it to her. Nope.
Apparently I'd go to all that trouble to create a dummy bank draft for $15.59.
I asked if we could conference in my bank. Nope.

I asked her what I was supposed to do since they sent me a notice (postmarked/dated yesterday) that my water is being shut off Saturday when I'd already paid it.

She told me to bring in a cancelled check from my bank.
*Do any banks still send cancelled checks?

I reiterated to this shining example of government efficiency that the payment was done online, so there was no cancelled check, only electronic verification including time/date of transfer and I could show that.

She puts me on hold (but hangs up on me).
I call back. Get Einstein again.
Says she is going to put me on hold again - I tell her not to put me on hold again.
Meanwhile I hear her long fake acrylic nails tapping away at the computer (ladies, you know how we can tell the difference in the sound. I'm guessing from the slug-like speed of her typing sounds that they were those long claw-like shaped ones with airbrushing and charms and 'diamonds' on them.)

6 minutes 49 seconds later she says "we have your payment."
and she hangs up again.

I call back again. Get her once more. I thank her so much for her assistance and courtesy in verifying this matter. I asked for her name for my records. She said she couldn't give out that information. I asked if there was Customer Service number or some sort of verification number I could have for my records so that I would have a record of the conversation. She said no.

So to piss her off, I said, "well, I guess it's a good thing I started recording the conversation after the first time we were disconnected."

(You shoulda heard the "oh shit" tone in her voice.)
Then I hung up on her.

No, I didn't really record it but... I thought it'd make her think twice next time.
At least I can describe her by her typing and nails in case my water still gets shut off over the weekend.