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| Dating Dilemmas |
| 12.15.05 (8:57 am) [edit] |
|
"P" emailed me this morning suggesting he pick up some food and come over to my place tomorrow night. I think I'm going to counter with we do dinner somewhere and perhaps come back to my place afterwards for dessert. My gut instinct with a guy wanting to come over to my place on a 2nd date would be "WARNING! WARNING!" but he's been very clear that he wants to take things slow. An alternate perspective would be that he's aware that I'm still rather jumpy and that being on my own turf would make me more comfortable. I know that not every guy is out for just a piece of ass - my intuition says that he's sincere - he's given me utterly no reason to doubt him, not to mention I find him utterly dreamy. ***Guys: your feedback on this? Thus presents a second dilemma... He's a MAJOR chocoholic - and I can't stand the stuff and I'm not a baker... I think he said he liked Tiramasu. Should I make something? Can I make Tiramasu tonight - will it be ok tomorrow? And the third dilemma... What to wear! Traditionally, on a 2nd date out, I'd show some leg... But coming over to my house - don't want to give off the wrong signal. Not to mention I'd have to clean the house. Ugh... |
posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (6:04 am)
Go with your gut, for sure! I'd suggest the dinner somewhere else. If he likes you, he won't pressure you to go to anyone's place!!
posted by: almsthvn (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (6:10 am)
Hmm!
Well... I think I'd meet again some where neutral for dinner and if that's going well, maybe invite him back to your place for dessert and a movie. I'd save Tiramasu for date #3 but that's coz I'm lazy ;) Unless you get it from the restaurant to go ! That's more my speed :)
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (9:48 am)
Reply to: rosietulips
He's anti-pressure with me. He reminded me this morning to breathe...
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (9:50 am)
Reply to: almsthvn
I'd like to do something nice to show some effort because he has been so sweet...
I'm sure we'll talk tonight and I'll propose eating out somewhere. Then again, I am just going to ponder it some more...
Where is the guy input on this????
posted by: rosietulips (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (10:39 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
*L* it's always good to have people in your life to remind you to do the important things :)
posted by: kreativekat (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (3:07 pm)
hmmm i say go somewhere else for dinner. I think it's too early for him to be coming over to your place.
tiramasu takes a while to make I think.I"m not a fan of the stuff so i don't know how long it would take.
go out somewhere else. then you don't have to worry about cleaning the house or baking. but it doesn't solve the "what to wear" dilemma. I can't help you out there.. I have't been on a first date(for that matter)and can't tell ya what to wear on a second date.
posted by: irishred (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (3:43 pm)
Ok first piece of advice:
1. Never listen to Rosie. (hehe)
Have him over, keep it casual, don't overthink it. Just have fun. If he is someone you like don't overthink everything. Maybe NOT planning much is the thing to do...chemistry (not sexual) but couple chemistry (or potential couple chemistry) is best determined by two people making something out of very little. That's a good test. Find out if you can have a long conversation with some good laughs.
Then have sex. (kidding) Have ice cream for dessert with chocolate toppings that he can put on. Not on you--the ice cream.
Good luck :)
Did I mention not to listen to Rosie? ;)
posted by: 14u2nv2 (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (5:33 pm)
Girl! Put on yer cucumber mask and bathrobe..lol..see if he's still interested.
posted by: bacardibreezer (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (11:25 pm)
I think you are right to take it slow...I know a woman's instinct is always right!!
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.16.05 (5:48 am)
Reply to: rosietulips
It was just such the perfect thing for him to say...
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.16.05 (5:51 am)
Reply to: kreativekat
House cleaned. Making chocolate lava cake (in souffle cups). The guy is a chocolate fanatic.
Had a long talk with a guy friend last night. Made the decision that I'm ok with him coming over. My instinct is to not make a big deal about it. Doubts are about myself. I don't think he's going to act out inappropriately. And that's not even my concern.
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.16.05 (5:54 am)
Reply to: irishred
Conversation has not been a problem with us. (Then again, I can converse with just about anyone...) And there is definitely some chemistry. Major chemistry. Maybe that's sort of what has me freaked out.
I'm going totally casual - no candles lit, decided to stick to jeans, and not even bother to change the litterboxes.
(Ok, I'm kidding about the litterboxes)
Thanks for the input.
posted by: ruined (reply)
post date: 12.16.05 (6:21 am)
That's a tough call. A lot of guys would think that just being invited to your house for dessert would be "the" signal. But, then again, a lot of guys are absolute jerks and utter pigs. If this guy is one of the exceptions - and you feel pretty sure he is - that would make for a great atmosphere for a fun time. :) Good luck with it!
by Redonthehead