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| Jen The Bipolar Stripper |
| 12.14.05 (9:49 am) [edit] |
|
Jen the bipolar stripper called me this morning and left a 4 minute rambling message. She's been calling me 4-5x a day with her number blocked for over a month without leaving a message. She said she was back in Florida (Translation: stripping again and probably back with her sociopathic husband). She sounded completely manic. She said she was tired of me not returning her calls. (Uh, she went 6 months not returning my calls without explanation - I provided her with a detailed explanation of why I desired no further contact last year. I sent her a note 3 weeks ago, reiterating that I wished her well but I had no desire for further contact with her.) She said she was 'tired of all this bullshit', that I 'shouldn't hold a grudge', that she 'guesses' I 'have all the friends' I need. I don't hold a grudge. I forgave her. But that does not mean I'm going to invite her back into my life. |
posted by: lynne (reply)
post date: 12.14.05 (7:02 am)
Yeah. Sometimes there are people who are simply toxic to us. It doesnt mean they are bad people or dont deserve happiness or whatever. It just means, we cant have them in our lives because they are bad for us. It sounds like she is toxic to you so I can completely understand your point of view.
posted by: almsthvn (reply)
post date: 12.14.05 (7:07 am)
woo boy.
When I learned that D's illness had a name and researched all the symptoms and treatments, I had a talk with my counselor. She gently suggested that I stop thinking in terms of him getting better and acknowledge that things were probably as good as they could ever be. My next decision was - could I/did I want to live my life like that and did I want to raise my child in that environment.
Sometimes for self-preservation you have to draw the line and say No. I don't hate my ex at all, or blame that he's BP or have malice - I simply had to make a choice what was best for me. And he wasn't it.
Right now you need loving and supportive people around you and she simply can't be that. And you won't be able to convince her otherwise, unfortunately. I think the best you can do is continue to not respond to her.
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.14.05 (11:39 am)
Reply to: lynne
Well said. I don't want to instigate any further turmoil in her life - but, as she has refused to take steps to stabalize her condition - medication, counseling, not drinking, having a schedule, blah blah blah - I feel like I've done all I can.
It's just getting the 4-5 calls a day EVERY day that has been annoying... And the tone of the vm was definitely bitter/angry - like that's going to encourage me to have a change of heart? Nope.
Thank you for the support. Points well made.
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.14.05 (11:41 am)
Reply to: almsthvn
Well said. I *do* feel sorry for her and truly wish that she'd get better - but she sucks the life and energy out of me. D-R-A-M-A and I don't need any more than I have.
Since I know she's in Florida now, I've thought of calling her parents - who I've been on good terms - to perhaps reiterate that I really truly sincerely honestly want no further contact with her.
posted by: LaLunaBella82 (reply)
post date: 12.14.05 (3:53 pm)
Wow. Dunno what happened but it sounds stressful!
posted by: kurtmaddox (reply)
post date: 12.14.05 (4:28 pm)
Good for you... grudges only cause pain to those holding them! Oh, and send the bi-polar strippor over to my place during a manic upswing ;-)
posted by: kreativekat (reply)
post date: 12.14.05 (6:37 pm)
yoinks sounds like a nut job!
posted by: onebadjen (reply)
post date: 12.14.05 (7:39 pm)
i'll take jen if you take my friend pj. i still haven't called her back. i am being a bad friend *sigh*
posted by: ruined (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (5:54 am)
Exactly. I wish all of my ex-girlfriends all of the luck in the world. That doesn't mean I want them back in my life. Hope she takes the message...
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (9:51 am)
Reply to: ruined
I just don't want to aggravate the situation or cause her any additional hurt...
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (9:52 am)
Reply to: onebadjen
No more D-R-A-M-A in my life, thank you very much. I'm hoping 2006 is anti-drama.
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (9:54 am)
Reply to: kreativekat
I don't mean to make light of folks with bipolar disorders. She refuses to get treatment. Is she nuts? No. Guilty of bad decisions? Yep and there are consequences to those decisions. She's used to getting her way by using her stripper wiles - doesn't work on me...
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (9:54 am)
Reply to: kurtmaddox
I just replied to someone else that she isn't nuts, but you just proved you are certifiable. ;)
posted by: kreativekat (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (3:10 pm)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
it's sad that ppl out there can't treat their illnesses when they are treatable. so many calls i get at work from phys saying their pats aren't taking their meds.
posted by: 14u2nv2 (reply)
post date: 12.15.05 (5:34 pm)
Hm too bad..I don't know what she did..so..can't comment on this one lol.
posted by: kurtmaddox (reply)
post date: 12.16.05 (4:49 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
Um, uh -- how about telling us something we DON'T KNOW!
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.16.05 (5:56 am)
Reply to: kreativekat
She's a sweet girl - but not the brightest - so I did a lot of research and reading on Bipolar Disorder. Shared with her a lot of really basic things she could do - even if she refused to take lithium. The funny thing is that she comes from a VERY wealthy family - she's been seeing the same doctor for 15+ years - refuses to see anyone else because 'he's nice and reminds her of Santa'.
Um, ok...
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.16.05 (5:57 am)
Reply to: kurtmaddox
That you like to steal women's panties and wear them on your head while you blog?
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.16.05 (6:02 am)
Reply to: 14u2nv2
Here's the backstory:
http://www.tblog.com/templates/index.php?bid=scubadiva&static=150615
posted by: kurtmaddox (reply)
post date: 12.16.05 (9:22 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
Who doesn't already know that? ;-)
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 12.16.05 (11:07 am)
Reply to: kurtmaddox
Um. Stay away from my panty drawer or the fur will fly buddy!
by Redonthehead