Penile Danny Devito

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Penile Danny Devito
08.01.05 (5:19 pm)   [edit]
Setting: YMCA Cardio Room

I'm on a treadmill facing a wall of mirrors. To my right is a series of rowing machines. The room is fairly empty. A tall guy walks in with fluffy feathered 80's hair and a tight t-shirt and rather ambiguous shorts.

Little did I realize the shock I would encounter...

I'm watching the tv attached to my console. Mr. Fluffyhead is rowing and talking to himself constantly, "Go for it! (groan) You are the man! (groan) Feel it!" It's a low mumble but I can hear it above the tv show in my headphones. It's rather annoying but I turn up the volume on the headphones. Then I glance down and look at the console to see how much time I have left.

And I see "it".

Yes, "it". Twig and berries. Nuts and bolt. Whatever analogy you want, when he slides up the rower to push off, it's there. Poking out.

I'm sure my eyes got as big as saucers. They go back to the tv. But I can still see in the corner of my eye the reflection in the mirror. And I'm traumatized. ("MAGNUM" PI he is not) I only had 9 minutes left and convinced myself I could keep my eyes focused on the tv. Then I decided to watch the screen on the treadmill to my left, so there would be no glancing over at it. But that threw off my balance. I thought of keeping my eyes closed, but that wouldn't work either. He seemed rather oblivious to the situation. I kept my eyes glued to the screen for the remaining workout but I was rather repulsed.

I've had no problem telling guys that their fly was undone, but telling him that Mr. Happy is flopping around, I don't have the balls (pardon the pun) to do that.

So guys, tell me, is there anyway that this guy was truly clueless that he was exposing himself or was I deliberately subjected to the penile version of Danny Devito?
 


posted by: MissJane (reply)
post date: 08.02.05 (9:28 am)

wow! You must really be in contact with a lot of men!
poor dude. unless it was intentional, eww



posted by: baileydog (reply)
post date: 08.02.05 (9:34 am)

you should have pointed and laughed while you walked away. that would have hilarious.



posted by: trekguy (reply)
post date: 08.02.05 (10:07 am)

Aw come on, no one goes to the guy with no jock, or at least some support for the "big guy and his jewels" UNLESS he WANTS to show off!!

It was intentional, and you just got 'lucky?" and were in the range of this guy, I'm sure it didn't matter to him which woman got a view!



posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 08.02.05 (2:42 pm)

Reply to: MissJane
It was the gym - there are guys there. Although most seem to be over 60.



posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 08.02.05 (2:43 pm)

Reply to: baileydog
If I was a guy and I had that 'shortcoming', I think I would have been futher traumatized by the pointing.



posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 08.02.05 (2:45 pm)

Reply to: trekguy
Sweetie, it was NOTHING to show off. Guys wear a cup to go jogging or work on the rowing machine? It sounds awfully uncomfortable. Wouldn't it pinch?



posted by: NurseNancy (reply)
post date: 08.03.05 (12:07 am)

you could say " Pardon me, but you are showing off your short-comings" eww,
I was on a subway in NYC when I was young. a guy had a newspaper on his lap when we were in the stations, but as soon as we moved he would put it infront of his face and his Mr BIG n' Happy was sticking out the bottom of his short cut offs. It was such a disgusting sight and my girlfriend and I nearly peed ourselfs laughing. He got off at the next station, not able to get it all back in!! Why do these guys want to do this? remember the Friends episode where the jock boyfriend had the "mouse out of the house?" !!!!



posted by: trekguy (reply)
post date: 08.03.05 (1:35 am)

Reply to: ScubaDiva
Not a cup just a supporter (jock strap minus a cup) or bikini underwear/tighty whities.

Cups are murder to wear!!! I had to wear one when I did Tae Kwon Do sparing, hated every second!



posted by: onebadjen (reply)
post date: 08.03.05 (4:03 am)

gawd my eyes are watering... i can just see the dude all the "you are the man" while rowing and all that... if he goes that far while working out and i kinda hate to go heree as you will have the better visual than me as you have seen his lil' pride and joy, but can you imagine all the pep talk when he masturbates? "ohh baby... c'mon for papa... oh yes... right there.. do it like that... oh... that's my good boy..."



posted by: almsthvn (reply)
post date: 08.03.05 (4:12 am)

Reply to: onebadjen
Excuse me, but do you have any duct tape, coz I just busted a gut laughing at your comment.



posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 08.03.05 (4:39 am)

Reply to: onebadjen
I was thinking with his comments that was probably what he said when he was having sex... So - we were close...

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