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| Spanking the Monkey (or Orangutan) |
| 07.13.05 (1:54 pm) [edit] |
|
Zoo Atlanta officials will know in a week or so whether the zoo's critically endangered Sumatran orangutans — Biji or Hati, or maybe even both — are with ape. If so, it'll be a "very big deal," the first time one of the great apes has become pregnant through in vitro fertilization, said Dr. Hilton Kort, co-founder of Reproductive Biology Associates in Atlanta, a pioneer and leader in the development and refinement of clinical procedures that enhance pregnancy outcomes in people. A 34-year-old male Sumatran orangutan named Allen C. gave his semen voluntarily, which he learned to do after months of "behavioral training" at the zoo, said Dr. Maria Crane, vice president of animal health and senior veterinarian at Zoo Atlanta. *** In case you missed it, the above paragraph says that they taught the Orangatuan to whack off. I'm just trying to picture how they inspired him - gorilla porn? I wonder if we go to the zoo, if we'll see them tossing off. (Don't you think that male apes did it prior to being instructed or were they just taught to toss off into a little plastic cup?) *** An additional note, Dr. Kort used to be my doctor 15 years ago. I don't make this stuff up! It's from the Atlanta Journal. I guess the orangutan's months of behavioral training was pretty much hands-on.:) |
posted by: kreativekat (reply)
post date: 07.13.05 (1:05 pm)
lol NO I did not miss it. I'm imagining they used the copycat method to teach him.
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 07.13.05 (1:55 pm)
Reply to: kreativekat
I guess we know where they got the term "Spanking the Monkey" comes from.
posted by: kreativekat (reply)
post date: 07.13.05 (4:16 pm)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
lol yes we do :)
posted by: Roxgirl (reply)
post date: 07.13.05 (7:39 pm)
this post mage me laugh!!! lol
posted by: AmyHCAlum (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (4:10 am)
tee hee hee hee! what a funny post to start my day off. Thanks!
posted by: kurtmaddox (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (5:04 am)
well, i taught myself the same trick when i was 12 or 13 without the able instruction of dr. kort! ;-)
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (5:17 am)
Reply to: kurtmaddox
But, you aren't an Orangatuan... Or are you?
posted by: kurtmaddox (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (5:23 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
well, let's see... i pick my nose, my ass, and i scratch things quite a bit. i love bananas and having sex in tree houses! i also favor the color orange.
yes, i believe i might be an oranatuan!
posted by: SusanofPudlin (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (5:52 am)
Reply to: kurtmaddox
I knew it!
posted by: SusanofPudlin (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (5:54 am)
This is rich. Reminds me of the monkey house at a zoo in Capron Park. This guy tossed a cigarette butt in front of the chimps cage. The chimp reached out, picked it up and started smoking it. It took quite some time for the visitors to talk the chimp into tossing it back out.
They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
I wonder if the orang suffers from premature..... never mind..... I think it best not to go there.
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (6:09 am)
Reply to: kurtmaddox
And, from your pictures, I can imagine with you hair messed up in the morning, the resemblance might even be moreso.
Do you throw your poop when you get ticked off at people too?
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (6:10 am)
Reply to: SusanofPudlin
Next thing you know, the chimps will be passing a bong around in a circle.
posted by: kurtmaddox (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (7:26 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
i don't just throw poop when i'm "ticked off" -- i throw poop at every available occassion -- when i'm happy, at weddings, at birthday's, funerals, parades, political conventions, sunday church services, and sometimes i just pick up a mound of dung and hurl it just to relax :-)
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (7:34 am)
Reply to: kurtmaddox
Remind me never to invite you anywhere.
posted by: kurtmaddox (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (7:46 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
oh, i'm an obedient monkey... i promise not to throw feces when you explicitly tell me to cease and desist. of course, you have to bribe me with a reward!
posted by: SusanofPudlin (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (8:07 am)
Reply to: kurtmaddox
Now why does this not surprise me?
posted by: SusanofPudlin (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (8:08 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
and then will they be saying (in Orang) "have you ever really looked at the lines in the palm of your hand?"
Question: wouldn't using a bong be using a tool?
So how can one be arrested for possesion of tools?
posted by: kurtmaddox (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (8:25 am)
Reply to: SusanofPudlin
uh... cause you've always known i'm a good poop-throwin' monkey down deep? ;-)
posted by: SusanofPudlin (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (9:58 am)
Reply to: kurtmaddox
- I always knew deep down you were a tosser!
posted by: NurseNancy (reply)
post date: 07.14.05 (11:07 am)
poor monkey, didn't even get to enjoy monkey sex with the mother of the little ape!
posted by: gambit3131 (reply)
post date: 07.15.05 (8:25 am)
I read this somewhere. hmm
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 07.15.05 (10:49 am)
Reply to: NurseNancy
Apparently one of the aforementioned parties wasn't that interested.
Or maybe the boy monkey is gay?
posted by: NurseNancy (reply)
post date: 07.16.05 (8:56 am)
Reply to: ScubaDiva
I thought monkeys liked to do it when ever!!! kind of like some commenting Tbloggers out there!
posted by: linda (reply)
post date: 07.18.05 (6:00 am)
My husband saw a bear from the San Diego Zoo whacking off as the train of guests drove by. His very conservative mother was quite embarassed. He found it quite funny....
posted by: ScubaDiva (reply)
post date: 07.18.05 (3:01 pm)
Reply to: linda
I would have laughed too. You know that song "Birds do it, bees do it" (well, I don't know if either species actually masturbates... Neither really have hands to go at it...)
by Redonthehead