Despite being sick, I closed a 24k deal today. Most folks in the office...didn't come close.

Our sales/paperwork process is really cool and automated but... of course when it can go wrong, it does.
We get stuff signed, fax it into corporate and usually, things are updated in the system within 10 minutes so we can finish things.

I've been waiting an hour.

I have been here since before 7am. I want to go home and crawl into bed.
I asked my boss what was up - he said to give it a few more minutes and it'd be fixed.
It's not.

He said he'd make a call if it wasn't.

Only problem with that is, he just left. 

Total tally for coworker conversations with wife today: 8.

Both he and I were out of the office at different times so I missed sharing some of those calls with them.

He's laughing hysterically about something with her.

To be married for a dozen years and still like this... says something.
What it says, I dunno.

Sounds racy, doesn't it?

It wasn't. I'm getting a cold. So much for the health kick when I'm coughing up stuff that clearly doesn't belong inside my body. I spent the weekend resting and intermittently getting up to do a domestic chore or two.

No booty calls over the weekend? Why?

I grabbed my business card case (which is identical in size/weight to my cell phone except it isn't a communication device) and had that sitting by my bed all weekend. It wasn't until I grabbed it yesterday to set my alarm that it wasn't my phone.
Duh!

I made some organic chicken soup - it looked good but since I can't taste anything, I don't know.

One of the things that irritates me is people that get involved in relationships and totally drop their friends.

Case in point - "E"
He's involved in a 'long-distance relationship' with a woman that he's been involved with several times before. The last time was more than a decade before. He never got closure. For some reason, they started emailing and talking. He told me that there was no way that he'd go down that road again with her.

Seems like he is.
He went out there a 2 weeks ago and is already talking about moving across the country.
(I bet you he's already shopping his resume around)

Before the 'LDR' got into full bloom, we'd usually talk once a day or at least every other day. Since then, he's on the phone with her as soon as he gets home from work and is on until very late in the night. (A little overboard anyone?)

Don't get me wrong, he's a great guy - but from what he said before he got sucked back in, I have my reservations. And this constancy is also screaming "crash and burn".  I want him to be happy, but I am skeptical.

So we were going to go see a show in town on Thursday night. Since I can't get him on the phone (he won't interrupt his convo with her with call-waiting -he disables it!), I emailed him if he'd be interested in some culture. He said he'd like to and he'd call me back. I called him Thursday (left a message before he got home so at least he'd be able to make an outgoing call) and he said he thought I was going to call him about it.

Um, no. We decided to go to the show Friday night instead.

He called me yesterday. We haven't talked in ages. In less than 2 minutes, the LDR calls him, he switches over, leaves me on hold for 5 minutes and says "It's her, gotta go" and hangs up.

I'm left staring at the phone thinking "WTF?"

He gets somewhat touchy about things... Do I even bother following up with him about the show or do I just invite someone else and let the phone grow to his ear?

The guy that sits next to me in cubicle-ville is a really nice guy. It's touching to see how devoted he is to her - he's sickeningly sweet at times. He talks to his wife about a dozen times a day. It gets old. The woman calls him for everything.

Case in point. (not suitable prior to breakfast)

She calls him yesterday to tell him she has diarrhea. (Not that I can hear her side of it)
He keeps asking questions about it.
She needs to pick up the kids from 'school'. (daycare)
So she has another 'attack' half-way to school.
She calls him to ask if she should turn around or try to make it to school.
This leads to a discussion.
He's asking her details.

Meanwhile, I'm trying to conduct a sales meeting with a prospective client on the phone.
Ick.

A department store opened up a new location near me. Sent me some cool coupons - $10 off any purchase plus an additional $10 off every $50 spent.

Not to mention some awesome mark-downs. I got one of those outdoor recliner chairs - regularly $149 for $49 (less $10). And then we worked on our spring wardrobe - got a ridiculous amount of clothes - a suit, three skirts, a dress, a jacket, and a twin set. For $250... less $50.

Retail shopping buzz.

There's a local tv-evangelist that loves to do some really grand productions - he's got a book out on fasting - maybe some of you catch his weekly shows. As I was flipping channels, this one caught my attention...

He's got kids flying over the church members as 'angels'. There is a very large live lion chained on a platform at one side of the stage. Lion is licking his chops.

There's also a live lamb chained on the opposite side of the stage.

That lamb looks pretty freaked out. Like 'where's the exit?' Lamb is trembling - not sure if it is the hokey performance - I'm sure his agent didn't tell him what this gig was about - or if it is the fact there is a live lion eyeballing him.

This should be a very moving production, but I was laughing... Is that wrong?

I have also gotten a flurry of booty-call text messages this morning from someone.

Apparently this individual woke up with 'something' on his mind.
I was half-tempted to have a male coworker lift up his pants so I could take a picture of his hairy leg and send it to this individual as a sure-fire way to put out that fire.

But I got busy.

I figured I would ask an 'expert' on the Hot Stud situation.

A friend of mine who has been the epitome of a player for quite some time. He's now in recovery. He was a front-man for a rock band until a few years ago. He's gone cold-turkey - throwing himself into work.

He could juggle and play women better than most entertainers at the circus.

Anyway, I wanted a player's perspective since I think it takes one to know one.

The former player said that Hot Stud is definitely playing me. I ended up defending him.
Which didn't help me figure things out any more.

Tux and Velvet got fixed/spayed/neutered yesterday.
I'm supposed to keep them separated.
I put them in different bathrooms with food, water, beds, toys and litter boxes.

And I got ZERO sleep last night.
Tux kept head-butting the door - he discovered he could actually get the door to pop open that way.
I'm sitting in bed and I find him out and about.

So I rigged the door with string to the banister, in theory so it wouldn't open.
Didn't stop the little fella from continuing to bang it all night long.
And the meowing.
Oh the meowing.

They are supposed to be kept in a confined area for several days after surgery.
I'm not sure I can handle that.

Behavior-wise, they are acting fine.
Just annoying the hell out of me.

Went to a restaurant opening of sorts last night. Cool place. "High School Guy" was there with his posse. (One of which is totally scorching hot - reminds me of Adrian Grenier some but Latin - and he knows he's hot so that totally negates it.)

I was there to meet new people. H.S.G. and his posse were there to drink. (Open Bar) I was circulating and they kept wanting to monopolize my time. They were drunk. I was 'nursing' a glass of wine (which in reality, I didn't drink at all). H.S.G. kept telling me to finish my wine.

It got annoying.

And the comments they were making about females was...so juvenile.

So they wanted to go out drinking after the event at the restaurant closed. I told them I had to go home. (None of them were even remotely sober enough to drive...) H.S.G. told me I could crash at his place. (I think not)

Then it got uncomfortable - but not his fault really. He offered to walk me to my car. I said I was okay - I had parked under a streetlight and I had my mace and self-defense training. (And a drunk dude is going to protect me?) He went on a rant about how mace is ineffective and someone would still rape me. I thanked him and said I'd be okay. He kept going on and on about how I'd get raped.

So I sort of abruptly said my goodbyes and left. I was irked at how I felt about the mention of rape. It sat with me for a long time last night.

Session yesterday was a repeat of other sessions. "The mom" takes notes during the session and then starts off the next session with a litany of comments about what was said previously.

This time, it was that I had said there was an air of secrecy in the house and that things were not discussed.

She wanted to know in detail about that. And why I didn't ask questions.

My response... I knew that questions weren't answered and that things were not discussed. I didn't know what was going on but the atmosphere was pretty clear.

She wanted me to cite examples. I offered some. She denied they ever occurred. And at 9, it was my fault that I didn't bring them up with the therapist that I was forced to see (these things that never occurred).

Have a lunchtime counseling session today with the mom. Not looking forward to it. I guess I just don't see value in continuing it.

Why?
The therapist isn't really doing anything to facilitate things. She says she wants to focus on the present and not the past but she keeps letting conversations go in that direction.

I don't see that it's a positive experience - being that the situation is being improved. I said I would attend if the mother selected a therapist and attended but at what point do I cut my losses? I feel like the only reason she's attending is to interact with me. If I feel like I'm not participating with an open mind any more, is it a good use of everyone's time?

(shrugging)

In an ideal world, I'd love to have a relationship with my mother but I am not at a point where I'm willing to bend/contort/compromise my own sanity to tolerate interacting with her. From time to time, I think what would I feel like if she died tomorrow? I love her and I hate that our relationship has been reduced to this but there comes a point where it is about self-preservation. I feel an incredible sense of loyalty and responsibility and gratitude toward her but for a very long time, I struggled with sacrificing my own well-being and sanity for interacting with her. I put up more and more walls to protect myself, but she'd roll right over them. And not only would I feel like dog squeeze for finally speaking up, but I'd have the build-up of all the other crap that I'd not said anything about. That breaking point...

When my interactions with someone make me into someone I don't recognize or like, that's a big red flag for me. I guess I'm in a sort of 'cleaning house' mode again.

If only I could shift that mode to my actual house!

I know that sounds harsh. I say it with a heavy heart.

There's a girl (mid-20's) working in our office as a support person. She grates me like fingernails on the chalkboard - something about her inflection is odd. Her voice drives most every other person in the office nuts. Every sentence includes "like" and "you know" and "I mean". Then every other sentence starts off with "My boyfriend..." She loves to remind us that her boyfriend is in radio. (Of course, I know that he does promotions which means he sets up remotes and tosses tshirts...)

She claimed last week that she was a  'finalist' for last season's "The Bachelor".

If she was a finalist for "The Bachelor", then I was a finalist for Playmate of the Year.

She's not an attractive girl. Not unattractive. But the ladies on there are hot. She claimed that she chose not to follow up for the final interview.

Um, okay. Let me get back to Mr. Whats his name that runs the Playboy mansion.

Most people in my life know that I'm up at 5am every morning - week day or weekend. My internal clock is jacked. I hate it but I try to make the best of it.

Being as I wake up at 5am (without a clock, mind you), I usually go to bed early. Like 9ish. I read or write or watch tv until I am dozing away (until the kittens start gnawing on my nose - how the hell I get them to stop that, I dunno!)

I put my phone on low for ringing or vibrate - just to make sure I'm not disturbed by late night booty calls. (It happens.)

I recall hearing after 10:30 that my phone was ringing - but I rolled over and went back to sleep.

This morning, I get up - I knew who it was by the ring - and see that they texted me afterwards... "Are you up?"

Um, apparently not. Girl needs ALL the beauty sleep she can get!

I interact with a lot of different professional people from time to time. i encountered a woman last week that wasn't exactly a great billboard for the services she was trying to push on me.

I've slimmed down considerably. I still have about 20 lbs I'd like to lose.

This woman started telling me how their weight loss plan would do 'wonders' for me - she weighed at least 2x what I do (she's pushing 300). I somehow have a hard time taking advice from someone that wasn't exactly in a position to make recommendations like that.

Sort of like accepting personal training from someone that seriously overweight - it's just hard to swallow.

She said that she'd get me on a plan of 800 calories a day - related from Medifast. I said that I appreciated the gesture but wasn't interested in losing the rest of the weight that way.

I had a business meeting with a photographer on Friday. (Hot Stud is also a photographer.) he's fairly well-known around here locally. It was creepy - the guy kept staring at my chest. He offered to do a free sitting for me.

I passed - said I didn't really have a need for pics.

He kept going on about it - about how he'd make me feel really comfortable and he does boudoir photography for select clients. I'm sure he's really talented and all, but there is NO way I'm going to do "that" kind of shoot with anyone that I have professional interaction with.

That's just icky. I felt like I needed to take a shower afterwards.

He emailed me later re-stating the offer for the shoot.